Making our own movies

I am totally hooked on doing something lately. Like, totally hooked…. because it’s changing how I take in life.

It happened almost by accident. In my car, I have a radio station set to classical for those moments that I have delivered every child to where they need to go and I can’t take any more Top Forty or KROQ.  Ughh. No more noise! I just want it quiet.


I suppose that has come with befriending myself. I like the quiet.

Lately, I have been setting these alone times to classical music and the oddest thing happened. Not distracted by words, life took an a new form. I was mesmerized to see the people I saw look more like characters in a movie.

I saw this. The little asian lady  who shuffled slowly, weighed down by her large red jacket and brown canvas bag that was almost as big as she was.  She seemed to walk down the street with purpose. I wonder what her story is? My eyes swept to the men in front of me- construction workers- waving me forward past the tractors shoveling gravel. Even their hand movements seemed beautiful and slow. Now, I know this seems a little silly, but I was shocked by how melodious life appeared when set to music.

I mean, it makes sense. It’s why movies are scored and set to symphonies that create an an emotional crescendo within us, taking us to those elevated points in the story where our hearts beat fast with anticipation or delight, only to drop us down into the deepest of valleys where we are so utterly moved and our tears break forth to console us. 

I began to experiment with this.

As I work on my thesis  and write this blog, I am sitting outside Corner Bakery. Set to subtle symphonies,  I watch those around me as they talk and laugh and share a meal… some with friends they feel comfortable around, others sitting alone, scanning the crowd, their feelings of loneliness almost palpable.

My eyes have settled on a little old man (I’m a sucker for little old men) and a younger man, who appears to be his son. They laugh lightly and I watch the older man seeming to take in the conversion, his face alive and radiant. Set to music, my emotions are engaged and I am in awe of the gentleness of the elder man, the slow nodding of his head. I wonder what his life has held, decade after decade. He slowly turns and catches me staring, but smiles easily nonetheless. 

Oh, little man, I envy your pace. Slow. Steady.  

I love that my eyes have caught that which is most for surely lost on those around us. All too often, we slip into auto-pilot, crossing off our tasks- to do lists- one by one. We forget, dear sisters, that life is more than a list of chores or accomplishments or duties.

I wonder what would happen, dear sisters, if we set our life to music.  Oh, it may not be classical, it may be something else, but I am convinced that music- melody- moments where we rise and fall- heightens and intensifies our emotions and allows us to see more clearly the beauty that is around us.

Oh life, you never cease to amaze me. Please tell He who gives you breath and places you into existence that I am in awe of how you ebb and flow. You are unpredictable and sometimes scary, but I am so in awe of your beauty. In awe. 

Absolutely in awe.

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