Have you ever asked your kids to describe you?

I am always surprised and amused to hear how I look through the eyes of my children.

I usually have some idea of what they will say,  but this particular conversation left me speechless. Continue reading

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Not feeling super well.

Last night I wasn’t feeling well. My head was pounding and my ears were ringing.
After grabbing my kids from school,  watching my daughter’s volleyball game and making dinner, I crawled onto the couch, placing an ice pack over my eyes. A few minutes passed, then a few more. Oh Lord, I so wish you had skin on because I really need to be taken care of right now. I heard little footsteps. “Mama” I opened my eyes to find this.

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The tears started to form. Hot tea and a love note. My heart melted. Oh Lord, you do take on skin. I just never recognize it as you!  They spilled over my cheeks as I reached for my phone. Alex started giggling and turned her head towards my son who was sitting on the other couch; “There she goes again, Jake. She’s blubbering.” Oh, bless’em.

As much as we love these moments and love sharing them with others, this is only part of the story. Sisters, let me tell you what you didn’t see. That same little angel left her lunch at home this morning and had a full-blown melt down on the way to school. In the last 24 hours I have been told that I am the most wonderful mom ever- like ever ever-  and that they wanted to trade me in for a new mom, preferably one that allows cell phones at the age of 12. Uh no, not happening.

So if you are struggling- children- spouse- job- health- I want you to know YOU ARE NOT ALONE. It’s tempting to fill in others’ stories with ease and perfection. The perfect kids. The perfect husband. The perfect job. But sisters, that is not the case. That is not the case!!! 

Follow up appointments are on the calendar

I scheduled my MRI and follow up appointment with my neurologist yesterday. We are set for October 13 and 15, respectively. Yes, it made me afraid. Even when I hung up the phone, I just wanted to crawl into someone’s arms and close my eyes. Funny, how we have these moments in life where we feel like a child again.

I’m scared, pop.

Arms would feel so safe right about now.

I tried to prepare my kids that I might be more emotional as I approach these appointments. We were driving home after  school (three different schools to be exact)“Guys, I just want to give you a heads up. I might be a little more weepy-emotional- than I usually am.” It was quiet for a second, then my middle one jumped in. “Mom, I just don’t see how that is possible. I mean really, last night you cried while we were watching the Chipmunks movie.” “Yeah,” my son quipped, “ we love you ma, but I’m not sure how much more you can cry.” Hmmm. They had a point. I started laughing as they brought up all the ridiculous things that I have cried over.  When Mulan cuts her hair and join the army.  A Johnny Test episode.(yep, definitely a low point)  Any commercial with a soldier returning home.  Oh, I love my babies. They keep me grounded, which is exactly where I need to be.